ouch... thats my heart you just broke.

i'm tired of hurting, i'm tired of arguing with Brianna over her drinking problem. I'm tired of constantly being a dissappointment to the people i care about. i'm tired of being hurt by the ones that i LOVE, these people make it so hard to go on, so why pretend that you care? tell me now and stop my suffering.
  • Current Mood
    scared scared

(no subject)

okay its been like 5 days, and that accidental cut on my leg is still bleeding. um thats not normal. i'm really depressed and i think i need to talk about it. i don't want to hurt my friends anymore and i'm tired of being hurt by the ones i love. like Bri and Linz... i don't know what i've done wrong, but i obviously did something terrible for them to be causing me this much pain...
  • Current Mood
    depressed hurt

(no subject)

i am so depressed i can't stand it. friday i almost commited suicide, saturday i cut, and today i'm planning on cutting. i always feel so alone, like i have no friends. but i know i do have people that care about me and i don't want to let them down, but sometimes suicide feels like its the only way out. i just guess after everything with Linz and Brianna i'm hurtin pretty bad right now. did i do something oso horrible that both of them don't want to speak to me anymore? jesus i just want to die!
  • Current Mood
    depressed depressed

(no subject)

um wow, so yea linz is pissed at me again. lovely. what the hell did i do? the only thing i can be accused of is caring too much. sorr y for caring? sorry for loving you? sory for being a friend. if i'm sorry is what you wanna here you got it, but don't block me for unjust reasons, esspecially if you won't tell me whats wrong.
  • Current Mood
    worried worried

(no subject)

i'm tired of feeling this way, like no one cares. i'm so tired of being sad all the time. its hard waking up in the morning, when i go to school i try and act like i'm happy, even though on the inside i'm always depressed. i'm always thinking that someone is mad at me, weither i did something or not. its such a challenge to pretend that i'm happy, esspecially when i'm constantly contiplating suicide. i can't deal with anything any more. i might as well just die...
  • Current Mood
    lonely lonely

(no subject)

i don't think i'm gonna be going to school tomorrow. my depression is taking over my life. i still can't stop thinking about how badly i screwed up all this time. i haven't been focusing in class, haven't done any of my homework or projects. i haven't been been eating. i cut last night and this morning. these aren't my usual types of cuts, usually i just slash lines, but this time they're words. On the top part of my left forearm it says LOVE ME. and on the bottom of my arm it says GET OVER IT. i really just wanna give up. i'm tired of living. i'm tired of being heard that my friends love me, and i'm tired of screwing up with the ones i love, you know who you are...
  • Current Mood
    depressed dangerously depressed